Dear Victoria’s Secret….

“Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it.”
Confucius

Click on the following link.

That was the first search I got when I typed in “hottest supermodels” in a search engine.

Click on the following link.

That was all of the possible links I could pick from when I typed in “girls with good personalities.”

See the difference?

Of course, there would be more searches on gorgeous supermodels than a girl with an awesome personality.

Like my boyfriend, surprisingly, stated: “Society trains girls to be unhappy with themselves.”

Wow, who would have thought that would come out of a guys mouth?

But, what he said is true.  From the moment girls can start choosing their outfits and styling their hair, they feel this doubt that something is missing from them.  Everybody is always going to look better than you.  Always.  Even if you have the best self-confidence in the world, and even if you are the most attractive person on this planet, I guarantee you will find someone, somewhere who has outdone you.  It may not be true, but those thoughts at some point will sneak into your head.  But has she really outdone you?  Is she truly better than you?

I may have two cats, but I am certainly not a crazy cat lady who is alone in life.  I have an awesome relationship with an awesome guy.  But how come when the Victoria’s Secret catalog comes in the mail, I page through it, ogle at the stuff I can’t afford, say that all of the girls are ugly and airbrushed, rip the catalog up, and then be upset for a good hour because my body will never look like that.  I know I can get at least one guy, but why do I feel sorry for myself?

Training.

Here’s what I said to Colin: “I don’t like it.  I try not to feel bad, but every time I see girls like that or think about being in a bathing suit I feel all bad.”

Why do I feel so bad?  What does “she” have that I don’t?  Okay, her stomach is a little flatter than mine, and her face is a little clearer, and she does have a really nice outfit on, but why do I have to hate myself?

Don’t even get me started on how girls act around attractive women.  As soon as a striking young lady walks in, clearly she looks really nice, girls go:

“Oh my gosh, she’s such a slut”

“Her dress is way too short.”

“Her hair looks bad.”

“She’s not even pretty.”

We all have been caught saying these things.  Why can’t we just say, “Wow that girl looks really good, and she is quite attractive.”

Yeah, that’ll happen once I can look at the VS catalog without wanting to crawl in a hole and die.

We can’t feel good for other people unless we truly feel good about ourselves.

Colin: “It’s not your fault, but it doesn’t have to be like that.  Try putting on a bathing suit and noticing all the things you do like about what you see.”

Easier said than done my friend.

But of course, he does have a point (of course he always has to be right).  Why can’t I look in the mirror and compliment myself on how good I look, or the good things about me?  Why do I always have to put myself down?  Sometimes it’s easy to get into that flow of woe-is-me-I’m-fat-ugly-and-no-one-likes-me phase.  But it is also very easy to get out of it.

So, instead of feeling sorry for myself, I went for a run with a good friend, which helped me clear my mind and made me feel good about myself.  Us women should try and feel better about ourselves and focus on everything we have that other girls don’t.  And we should appreciate the beauty in others instead of always putting them down.  They probably feel as self-conscious as we do, and if they don’t, then kudos to them.  They’re just trying to walk on their own runway.  As we all should!

Watch this video.  I was first introduce do this in my Women Studies class, it’s on the Dove website.  “No wonder our perception of beauty is distorted.”